Awaken the Wolf
by SiriusBlackfan5405
Summary: This story was written by a friend of mine. It answers the question of what Remus was doing after he left Hogwarts and before The Order was refounded. It starts after one full moon when Remus has forgotten to take his potion.
1. Chapter 1

It was the shivering that finally wakened Remus. Or, more precisely, the sound of his teeth banging together as his body shook uncontrollably. He immediately recognized the familiar post-transformation pain. His muscles felt stretched to the ripping point and every bone ached.

But why was he so damn cold?

His eyes flew open ….the potion! He had forgotten to take the potion! What had he done? Where had he gone? How had the madness of the full moon taken him this time?

His surroundings only raised more questions than they answered. He was lying on a hard, cold floor in a semi-enclosed space – a storage area of some sort. But the most surprising thing was the cage, a large metallic cage surrounded him.

Remus stood shakily and limped to the front corner of his cell. He found a bathrobe and a blanket neatly folded. Next to them was a bottle of water and, Bless the Powers, a chocolate bar.

Sighing, he quickly slipped on the bathrobe and arranged a seat out of the blanket. He made a conscious decision to be grateful that his captor had done just that, captured him, and had not decided to create a world with one less werewolf in it. Putting the thought out of his mind, he sat to enjoy the many uplifting properties of dark chocolate.

Remus judged it to be about mid-morning when she wandered in. A short but graceful figure appeared in the distance. She had dark wavy hair that fell past her shoulders and wide-set brown eyes. Remus rose to greet her properly. The dark eyes bored into him as she made unbearably slow progress towards his cell. He found himself attempting to straighten his bathrobe.

"I'm Leilani," she announced.

Remus mustered as well-intentioned a smile as he could, "I'm Remus." The words seemed to hang in the air as Leilani raised a questioning eyebrow at him. "Lupin." He offered begrudgingly. She hadn't given her full name. "Remus Lupin."

There was a flicker of recognition in her dark eyes. "Professor Remus Lupin?" she asked, "From Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry?"

"Former Professor, yes."

The woman considered this a moment, then swung open the cage door. "Come with me and I will tend to your wound."

Remus stared at her. "The door, it was open the entire time?" he asked.

Leilani shrugged. "The cage cannot hold a human against his or her will. Follow me."

Remus followed her into the brisk autumn air He scanned the landscape and wandered just how far he had traveled, the area did not even seem familiar to him. As the pain in his bones started to subside, he realized his left shoulder was throbbing and burning as if on fire. Leilani seemed sensible enough, he would accept her offer of healing and ask her to point him in the direction of home.

Leilani led Remus towards her farmhouse wondering just what she had gotten herself into. She must have been crazy to think this plan would work. Absolutely mad. A voice interrupted her thoughts, a deep, gutteral voice, rich with subdued power. A voice only she could hear.

_He's rather scrawny looking as a human, isn't he_?

Leilani carefully formed the thought-words in her mind. _When you told me you were bringing me a werewolf you neglected to mention that he was a Defense Against the Dark Arts Professor._

_But look at him, the voice answered, He is weary. He tires of the fight. If we have to we can break him._

"Mmmmm," Leilani responded absently.

"I'm sorry, what was that?" asked Lupin.

Leilani almost tripped. She must have spoken aloud; she would have to be more careful. "Tea," she said, "I was wondering if you would like a cup of tea."

"Please, yes," came the strained reply.

They walked the rest of the way in silence. Leilani lead Remus into the house and the second she closed the door behind them she was aware of a shift in her mind. Say it, the voiced hissed, Say it now. She ignored it as she invited Lupin into the kitchen and cast a warming charm on a pot of water. She felt a wave of impatience rising inside her, I told you to say it!

The moment is not right, she answered as soothingly as she could. The returning surge of frustration and anger threatened to overwhelm her, but Leilani stood her ground. She knew she was not committed until she spoke the words.

With a deep breath she turned back to her exhausted guest. "Let's have a look at that shoulder, shall we?"

Remus realized the woman had spoken, but all he was aware of was the pain. His entire left shoulder down and across his back throbbed and burned with a fire all their own. The pain was almost unbearable, he had never felt anything like it….except once. Unasked for, the memories came rushing back him. He felt again like a helpless child, waking at the first light of dawn and screaming as he had never before in his life. He hadn't been aware of anything but the fire that had rushed through his veins and threatened to consume him. Even at a young age, he had felt the curse in those wounds and realized that he would never be the same again. He was only dimly aware of the woman turning him away from the light and slipping the robe off his shoulder.

A moment later cooling relief washed through him. As the pain continued to subside, he became aware of his surroundings again.

"- sorry," the woman was saying, "You should have told me how bad it is, how much pain there was."

Remus managed a weak smile. "It's okay. My kind generally has a high tolerance for pain."

"It's not okay," Leilani's voice was strict as she brought herself to task for her oversight, "A healer must never become so distracted that they cannot feel the sufferings of others."

"I'm sure it's not everyday that you entertain the notion of inviting a werewolf into your home," said Remus gently.

Leilani seemed to consider this a minute. "I would be honored to share a cup of tea with any witch or wizard that Albus Dumbledore deemed worthy to instruct his students, "she said at last, "Of course you are welcome here."

A part of Remus couldn't help but to chuckle as he wondered if Leilani would ever have the opportunity to meet Severus Snape.

"This wound is quite severe. Can you tell me what happened?"

Remus shook his head and immediately wished he hadn't, as a spasm of pain shot across his back. "I remember nothing of my time spent as a werewolf."

"Are you sure?"

Remus thought it odd that she would press him so. She was obviously skilled in the Healing Arts; anyone so educated should be familiar with this basic concept in the werewolf plight.

"You know," Leilani began, "There is a Wolfsbane potion that – "

"I know about the potion," Remus snapped, "I just forgot to take it."

"I see. I didn't mean to offend you, Professor. I just believe that education and prevention are the two best medicines."

"I'm sorry," Remus apologized, "I'm not angry with you." He felt a new tingling sensation across his back and found himself relaxing muscles he hadn't realized were tense.

"Well, very few bones are broken," Leilani told him," I've concentrated your strength on rebuilding them and beginning to repair the torn muscles. It will take time though, your magic and healing energies are weak. Is that always the case after your transformation?"

"Yes," Remus answered glumly, "It usually takes me a few days to recover."

"You must really fight it to be so weakened I've always wondered why those in your condition insist on battling the inevitable"

Remus glanced up at her. He couldn't expect her to understand.. To know that you will be pushed down, trapped and utterly out of control in your own body. To realize that your body is becoming foreign to you, strange and powerful, capable of great destruction. No one could truly understand unless they had experienced it.

"I have to, " he told her.

"How often do you forget to take the potion?"

"Occasionally. But more often than not I take the potion and avoid becoming the monster."

"Professor," Leilani sounded surprised, "You make it sound as if you believe werewolves to be evil."

"Aren't they? Their sole desire is to attack humans. Violence is their most basic urge."

"I'm not so sure I see it that way," Leilani responded, "Perhaps the werewolf isn't evil so much as untamed. There are many non-magical predators that have attacked humans, but that hardly makes them evil."

Remus sighed and said nothing. Other predators attack for food or to protect themselves or their young. Leilani's ideas could certainly be debated, but, again, until she experienced it, she could never understand. There was only one time in his life that Remus might have believed it. One time when being a werewolf had actually seemed fun and adventurous, when it had seemed just a wild part of him that could be tamed, but he had long since recognized that thought as the foolishness of youth.

Leilani had finish applying a salve. She set a potion down in front of him with instructions on how to take it. "Plenty of rest is vital," she told him, "You need to replenish your magic and healing energies. I have a room you may use until you are well enough to travel. You are welcome to stay as long as you need to." She set some toast in front of him, " I know you're exhausted, but please try to eat and I'll prepare your room. "

Remus suddenly felt how right she was. He struggled to stay conscious as he sipped his tea. In the sudden absence of pain he craved nothing more than to sink into oblivion.

His hostess reappeared soon after he had finished eating. She led him up the stars and down the hall to a large bedroom with an adjoining bathroom. On the dresser were clothes, neither old nor new, but simple and comfortable-looking. The woman bid him goodnight and left Remus to fall into a deep, peaceful sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

Remus awoke to the sight of sunlight streaming through his window. It only took him a moment to remember where he was. There was a clean change of clothes waiting for him; he dressed and headed down the stairs to the kitchen.

"Good morning," Leilani greeted him cheerfully from the stove. She was the picture of morning perkiness. "I'm sure you'll be wanting a cup of tea. Oh, and how would you like your eggs?"

The question hadn't registered yet, but Remus found himself sniffing the air, "What's that smell?"

"Coffee," Leilani informed him as she waved her mug in the air. "Would you like some?" she asked him hopefully.

"Um, no. Thank you. Tea would be fine."

"It's so American of me, I know," Leilani blushed, "But after my seventh year at Hogwarts I studied Muggle medicine in America and quickly became addicted. Believe me, coffee is the life-blood in the veins of the American college student. Well, that, and alcohol."

The story seemed vaguely familiar to Remus. Perhaps he did know her – at least by reputation. "I'm sorry," he asked her, "What did you say your last name was?"

Leilani's back was towards Remus, but he noticed a definite stiffening in her posture.

"I didn't say." Her voice was unreadable. She turned towards him and studied his face as she approached with his tea. "It's Kontos. Leilani Kontos."

She must have noticed the glimmer of recognition in his eye, because she sat at the kitchen table as if to tell him that she was awaiting his reaction. Remus found this unnerving, as he was not sure just what kind of reaction he was supposed to be having. Best to proceed with caution.

"You've written several articles advocating the integration of Muggle and Magic medicines," he told her.

"Yes, I have." Leilani folded her hands purposely and set them on her lap; she was all business now. Remus couldn't help but to feel this was a test of sorts. Still not sure what the test was about, he decided to stick with the facts. Always stick with the facts, especially when you're a Professor.

"As I recall, they were a bit controversial."

Leilani gave a slight smile. "That, my dear professor, is 'a bit' of an understatement. I was publicly labeled as 'a fiend, whose intent is to subvert our pure heritage with medieval barbarism'."

Remus snorted. "That almost sounds like a direct quote from Lucius Malfoy."

"It was."

They both chuckled and drank for a while in a comfortable silence.

"So," Leilani asked finally, "Did you read my articles?"

"Yes, I did."

"What did you think?"

Ah, thought Remus, so this was where she was taking him. As it was obviously something of great importance to her, he thought it best to remain unbiased. A woman's life work was always dangerous territory.

"To be honest, I know very little about your field. I really couldn't say."

"Okay," Leilani seemed to accept his answer – for all of about five seconds, "Okay, so maybe you don't understand the finer points, but do you think it just might be possible that the Muggle world may have something of value to offer us?"

"You mean – just – in general?"

Leilani nodded.

" I've really never considered that before," Remus thought about this for a long moment. It was a valid question and he wanted his answer to be truthful. "But I can tell you this: My mother was a Muggle and she offered as much to me and my personal development as my father. Of course, she did not advise me on the practice of magic, but I still learned a lot from her. She was a wonderful person, open-minded, empathetic and always willing to share her life experiences with me. So . . . .yes – in a general way - I believe that there are things that can be learned from Muggles."

He glanced over at Leilani. She seemed pleased with his answer, but said nothing. Without another word, she resolutely stood up and headed back to the stove to begin cooking. It was almost as if she had been weighing a decision and had made up her mind right before his eyes.

Remus guessed it was time for a change of subject. "So, how did you know that I've been teaching at Hogwarts?" he asked her.

"Well, the disapproval of the Ministry of Magic may have me living in the middle of nowhere, but it certainly doesn't stop the delivery of the Daily Prophet."

"I'd wondered about that. I've been studiously avoiding the paper for quite a while," Remus didn't need to read it to know what had been said. As a Mudblood and a Werewolf, he never failed to attract his own share of controversy.

"How is Hogwarts these days?" Leilani's question interrupted his thoughts.

"Oh, it's just as full of magic and mischief as it ever was." Remus smiled, "Though I must admit that I see things differently now that I am the one trying to actually contain the mischief. It was a role reversal that I enjoyed. In my opinion, our future is in fine hands."

"Was Harry Potter one of your students?"

"Yes, yes he was."

"And…….what is he like?"

Remus stopped. Was this a warning sign? He looked up at Leilani suddenly, but she was busy cooking and didn't seem to notice. What did she want to know? Was she trying to draw out information about Harry from him? He must have waited too long to answer because Leilani looked up at him. She seemed to recognize the concern on his face.

"Please don't worry, " she reassured him, "Harry Potter has no enemies here. I'm sure it's not the first time you'll be asked those questions; there surely isn't a witch or wizard in the world not curious about the boy who bested Lord Voldemort."

Remus couldn't help but to notice how easily the words rolled off her tongue. She hadn't even hesitated to say his name.

"I imagine you're right," he told her, "Though few people would be so quick to say so."

Leilani paused questioningly as she set a plate of scrambled eggs in front of him. "Ah, I forgot," she said in understanding, "We aren't supposed to say his name anymore. Honestly, though, don't you think that by refusing to speak of him, by calling him 'You-Know-Who' or 'He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named', we are actually creating more fear in ourselves and giving him more power over us?"

"Hmmm," Remus said thoughtfully, "That sounds like something my mother might say, and you both have an insightful point, but I'm afraid the world we live in may see it differently."

"You see," Leilani told him as she jabbed her fork in the air, "It's a Muggle science called Psychology. Without all this magic to fix everything, Muggles are forced to use their brains sometimes."

"Oh?" Remus raised an eyebrow, "Is that what they were using when they created the first concentration camp?"

"I'm not sure," Leilani shot back, "But perhaps you could tell me what the first wizard to conjure the Cruciatus curse was using?"

Remus leaned back and looked at the small woman across the table from him with renewed respect. "Touche," he saluted her.

Leilani hand flew to her mouth and her body began to shake. It took a moment for Remus to realize it was with silent laughter. He waited politely for her to regain her composure, but she wasn't stopping. He didn't understand it; one moment he had been debating a point with a mature, intelligent woman and now he sat across the table from a giggling adolescent. Clearly living alone had brought her to the brink of madness.

Leilani glanced up at him and, as if sensing his disapproval, began to laugh even harder. Remus carried his dish to the sink and washed it. Turning back towards the cackling form, he cleared his throat.

"Yes, well, thank you for all your hospitality," he said, "But I must be leaving.

As quickly as it had started, the laughing fit was over. "Nonsense," Leilani told him, "You're still hurt. You must stay."

Remus blinked. Had he missed something? The sudden change in her demeanor was almost surreal. "I really appreciate all you have done for me, but that's really not necessary. I shouldn't impose on you any further."

Leilani didn't argue, but simply stepped closer to him. She laid a hand on his good shoulder and looked intently into his eyes. "Remus Lupin," she said calmly, "This is my house and I insist that you stay until you are completely healed."

"But – I" Remus started, but suddenly he felt all his arguments melt away. For the life of him, he couldn't think of a single reason to leave. This place was warm, comforting and restful. It was, indeed, a good place to heal. "Thank you," he said finally, "I think I will."

. "Good," Leilani stepped back. "Now let me take a look at your back."

She headed towards her medicinal pantry, careful to give no sign of the smugness dwelling in her mind.

**Yes, yes,** said the ever- present voice, **You did very well.**

_You might be right, _she responded, _It just might work with him._

**I am right about him.**

_Oh, don't be so proud of yourself yet. Yes, we've gained some of this trust today. Yes we've learned a little about how he thinks, but we still have a long way to go._

**Yes, well . . . . . . I told you so.**

Leilani silently rolled her eyes as stepped back into the kitchen with her salve. She examined Remus' back and couldn't help but to wince at the sight of his still-mangled skin. _Couldn't you have been a bit gentler with him?_

The voice laughed heartily. **That? To a werewolf that's hardly more than a lovebite.**

Leilani ignored the comment and focused on repairing the damage in front of her.

"Your bone structure is looking good," Remus heard Leilani say, "Time to concentrate your energy on mending the muscles. When I'm done here you should go back to bed."

"I'm fine."

"No," she told him firmly, "You need your rest."

"I'm okay. I heal very quickly. Almost good as-OUCH!" Remus shouted as a sudden stab of pain shot through his shoulder; it felt as if someone had taken a branding iron to his back. He leapt to his feet and swung around to face his attacker.

"A-ha," Leilani said triumphantly, "If you were really fine, would that have hurt?"

"What did you do to me?" Remus demanded.

Leilani blinked, the picture of wide-eyed innocence. "I poked you."

"With what? A dagger?"

She waved a lone finger in front of his eyes. "Don't be so dramatic."

Blushing slightly, Remus sat back down in his chair. What was it about this woman that allowed her to get under his skin? "And here I thought you wanted to help me," he accused her teasingly.

"Oh, but I do," Leilani answered, "I am saving you from yourself – and the dangers of doing too much too soon."

"Well, I must say, you know how to make a point. I suppose I will be spending my day resting."

"Fantastic idea." A flick of Leilani's wrist and his pain abated.

"Do you like to read?" she continued as if nothing had happened. " I have an extensive library with suitable 'resting' chairs."

"I love to read -and the 'resting chairs' sounds like a fair compromise. Thank you."

"Smart man." Leilani smiled.

"The library is to the left of the living room," she said as she carried his salve back to her pantry. "Feel free to help yourself to the kitchen when you get hungry. I should be back around dinnertime."

"Back?"

"Yes," she answered as the re-entered the room, several potions in hand; "I have some patients to attend to."

"Patients?"

"Why, Professor Lupin, my healing methods may be 'barbaric', but that doesn't mean they don't work." She gave him a mischievous wink and disapparated.


	3. Chapter 3

Extensive was a good word to describe it, as would be vast, immense, and, in Remus opinion, beautiful. Remus idly wandered up and down the library's numerous isles, browsing the selection. There must have been thousands of titles about health and medicine, written both by healers and Muggle doctors. But there were books on nearly every other subject he could think of as well.

Where to start? Remus had already spotted several of his old favorites, as well as a few books he'd been meaning to get around to reading. He started his second path through the many shelves and found himself thinking of his earlier conversation with Leilani. She seemed quite fervent in her belief in Muggle wisdom. It was rather unusual to find such open-mindedness in a member of a pureblood family like the Kontos. Yet, Leilani had even left her home to spend several years studying Muggle medicine and openly championed the value of it.

And her ideas on Voldemort, or rather, his many aliases' did sound like the kind of reasoning his mother might have used. Remus smiled as he thought of the countless times that the seemingly simple-minded wisdom of his mother had proved true to the shock of both he and his father. He'd always assumed it was a woman thing, or perhaps a mother thing, but Leilani had called it a science. A Muggle science. What had she called it again?

"Psychology," he said aloud as the word came to him. No sooner had the sound escaped his lips than a soft yellow light caught his attention from the next isle over. He limped over to take a closer look, and realized the glow was emanating from all books related to psychology.

"Herbology," he said experimentally. The air around him darkened and a large section of the left wall was suddenly suffused with golden light.

"Now that's impressive," he said to no one in particular. So few people took the time to use Organizational Magic anymore. The spells required to do so were simple on their own, but needed to be cast and interwoven in a complicated and exact order. It required patience and focus, and Remus had almost despaired that it was a forgotten art.

"Psychology," he said again and perused the brightened titles before him. Choosing a book, he carefully made his way to the cluster of comfortable looking chairs to his right.

As he gingerly lowered himself into the largest chair and lifted his feet to the matching ottoman, he couldn't help but to notice that Leilani seemed to have left just enough pain in him to keep him from actually doing anything. Now that his body was still, he found himself feeling more comfortable than he had in years. Almost like sitting in a cloud. Sighing happily, Remus opened his book and began reading.

Remus wasn't sure how long he'd been sleeping, but when he awoke, there was a tall glass of chocolate milk on the lamp table to his right. Though he might usually have looked for a cup of tea this time of day, he took a sip and realized that it was just what he had wanted.

He stretched experimentally but found that his only reward was the increase of pain. Perhaps he should go looking for the potion Leilani had left with him yesterday.

He managed to climb out of his chair and headed towards the kitchen. From the sounds of things, Remus guessed Leilani must have had a troupe of 50 house elves preparing their dinner. He heard constant murmuring. broken by the sounds of pots and pans banging around. As he entered the room, he was surprised to find only Leilani.

You're past due." She told him gruffly as she set the potion in front of him.

Remus measured his dose as Leilani returned to her cooking and cleaning. She started off again quietly, but in a few moments time she was back to banging things around, spouting forth a stream of poisonous words.

"Having a bad day?" Remus asked her mildly.

"What?" she turned back towards him, and look surprised to see him there. "Oh I'm sorry," she spit out in a rush, "Where are my manners? How are you feeling? How is your back?" She started towards him to take a look.

Remus waved her off. "Still a bit tender for your current mood, I believe."

"Oh, you're right, I'm sorry. I just – I stopped and visited my mother today." She told him as she threw herself into the chair across from him.

"I see," said Remus.

"She's a horrible banshee of a woman, you know," Leilani told him, "Oh, I don't know why I let her get to me."

"Family has a way of doing that," Remus told her consolingly.

"You would think," Leilani began as she got up and continued cooking, "That being a member of such and rich and influential family as mine would be a blessing."

"One would certainly think so."

"Yes, well, to be honest it does have its benefits. I don't want to sound spoiled or ungrateful or anything. It's just that it's so limiting, you know? There's all these boundaries and rules about how you have to be and what you have to think. Powers forbid you actually have a thought of your own. She wants me to renounce my statements on Muggle medicine. Can you believe it? Just give up my work – forget all my research – forget who I am – everything. And why? Just because I'm a Kontos and Kontos don't make those kinds of waves."

"So what did you tell her?" Remus asked quietly.

"I told her no, of course. This is important. I mean, it's not just a matter of pride; it's a matter of improving our heath, our healing practices and our lives. Oh you can bet she didn't like that. She threatened to cut me off – take everything away. I spend less money running this house for a month than she does on a single dinner. But, yes, she even threatened to take the house back and throw me out just because I stand up for my beliefs. So, I had to get out the big guns. I told that if she did that I'd give up the Kontos family secret. I'd give an exclusive interview to the Daily Prophet."

"The Kontos have a family secret?"

"Hmmmm?" Leilani looked up at him sharply almost as if she had forgotten he was there. "Oh yeah," she shrugged off the question, "Don't all rich and powerful families? I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you – and we wouldn't want that, would we? So, how was your afternoon?"

"Restful…. um, is something burning?"

"Oh, oh," Leilani shot out of her chair and over to the oven, where she took out a very, very well done London Broil. "Oh damn you, Mother." She put the blackened meat on the table and flopped back into the chair opposite of Remus. "I'm sorry, Professor. I am forever burning food when I get mad. Dinner won't always be like this, I promise."

Remus poked the charred flesh experimentally. "You must be very angry," he commented.

"Not anymore," Leilani told him as she took a deep breath. "Cooking cleanses my soul. You could say I just burned my inner demons away."

Remus just looked at her. What could he say to that? Leilani was already opening and closing various cupboards. "Even so," she said more to herself than to him, "It wouldn't hurt to have something safe. Pasta. It's almost impossible to burn pasta."

True to her word, Leilani's anger seemed to have dissipated and she once again made pleasant company. She asked Remus how he had enjoyed reading up on psychology. When he admitted he hadn't gotten very far before falling asleep she proceeded to tell him a little about it.

"About half of what is psychology could be summed up as common sense and good child-rearing, but you'd be surprised how many people are lacking in those skills," she told him.

Remus enjoyed listening and learning about the subject, he thought he might pick up the book again tomorrow.

After dinner they shared a pot of tea and before long Remus felt his eyelids growing heavy with fatigue. Leilani smiled at him and he got the distinct impression that she had added a sleep aid to his tea.

"Professor, why don't you go to bed," she urged him finally, "I'll clean up here."

Remus stifled a yawn, "I think I will, and please, call me Remus."

Leilani smiled again. "Goodnight, Remus."

"Goodnight."


	4. Chapter 4

The next few days passed in very much the same fashion. Remus spent most of his time sleeping or in the library, reading and resting. One morning as he was sitting at the kitchen table, having just resigned himself to admitting that this healing thing was rather nice, a movement caught his eye over the top of his tea cup. He looked up to find a house elf staring at him.

"Good morning, Kind Sir, my name is Winston. May I inquire as to yours?"

Remus stared back for a moment, not sure if he was hallucinating. Leilani didn't have house elves. He'd been here nearly a week and had come to the conclusion that she was quite content without many of the luxuries her name could provide.

Not only that, but Winston was, without a doubt, the neatest house elf Remus had ever seen. The rag he wore was pristine, spotless, almost blindingly white. His skin nearly sparkled with cleanliness and good health. His speech bespoke intelligence and education. Even the elf's ear hairs were neatly trimmed.

Apparently Winston was not sure if he should interpret Remus' hesitation as stupidity or deafness, because a moment later he announced very slowly and very loudly.

" I AM WINSTON. WHAT IS YOUR NAME?"

The repeated question shook Remus out of his reverie. "Hello, Winston, my name is Re-"

"Randy!" Leilani nearly screamed from behind him. "His name is Randy," she repeated calmer, as she entered the room, "And you can tell mother that his last name is none of her business."

She grasped the teapot and re-filled Remus' cup, winking at him as if trying to convey a secret message that Remus was at a loss to understand. Winston shrugged his shoulders as if to indicate that he had given it a try. He made a gesture with his hand and two of the smallest house elves Remus had ever seen appeared behind him. One was a picture of the perfect servant, standing tall and eager to comply to his or Leilani's slightest whim, the other seemed somehow to be melting right into the floor.

"Hello, boys," Leilani called from the far counter where she was stirring two glasses of chocolate milk, "How's the training going?"

"Great!" the one on the left hopped up and down from one foot to the other in his excitement, "Cally says I am a natural." He stilled himself and took a deep breath, obviously trying to impart his next words with maturity and pride, "I have many long years of servitude to look forward to."

At this statement, the other little one drooped even lower than Remus had previously thought possible. Leilani noticed this too.

"What's wrong, Lucky?" she asked him gently, "Things aren't going so well for you?"

Lucky nodded slowly and looked up at her with huge eyes that were brimming over with tears. "Lucky broke the mirror in Mistress' upstairs library today. Winston says Lucky is hopeless." The little elf choked back a sob.

"Nonsense," Leilani told him as she patted him on the head, "That mirror was hideous, not to mention completely useless. Only the profanely vain would put a mirror like that in a library."

Lucky brightened just a little.

"Now, the first thing I'd like you guys to do is the kitchen, and that absolutely must start with the two of you emptying these glasses of chocolate milk."

The boys reached for the glasses happily and Winston rolled his eyes. "Your kitchen will be spotless, Young Mistress," was all he said.

"Funny, " Leilani commented, with just a hint of teasing suspicion in her voice, " I didn't realize it was Thursday already."

"It's not," Winston admitted, "Although the mirror was easily repaired, I thought it best to get Lucky away from the Mistress for a while."

"I see. Smart thinking."

Leilani grabbed a cup of coffee and gestured to Remus to follow her into the library. As he followed her, he debated broaching the subject of the odd creatures that had just appeared in her kitchen, but quickly abandoned it, as he as a guest here and did not want to see rude.

He needn't have worried about it.

"Mother thinks it's inhumane to be without a slave," she said bitterly as soon as they were out of earshot, "So she sends Winston, Lucky and Nottie here every other Thursday to help out."

"You don't like them?"

"Oh, I do. I've known Winston for as long as I can remember, and the boys have known me since they were born. It's just that I think it's more about getting the dirty details than actually helping me"

"Your mother?"

"Yes. She can't send an owl or stop in for a visit like a normal witch. She feels that if information is not gained by a devious method it's not worth knowing."

Leilani stepped away from him in a way that signaled the end of the conversation, so Remus settled himself in his now favorite chair and reflected on how comfortable he was becoming here. Perhaps that was the reason he hadn't left yet. He couldn't deny that he had been well enough to travel the past 2 days, but he found himself reluctant to move on. He decided he should leave soon, before he wore out his welcome. Tomorrow. Or maybe . . . Friday.

Leilani moved to a desk in the middle of the library and rattled off a list of titles that piled themselves neatly on the desk. She opened a drawer and took out some parchment and a quill.

Tell him.

She ignored the voice and began leafing through "Nature as Your Medicine Cabinet: Medicinal Herbs and Their Uses."

Tell him.

The voice was quieter now than it had been before, but still eerily insistent. Leilani continued to ignore it and wrote on the top of her parchment.

BUPLEARUM – breaks through obstructions, restores blood and energy flow

Can it restore the flow/direction of magic?

Tell him.

DONG QUAI – moves and disperses stuck energy (magic?), calms restlessness

Tell him now.

Leilani took a deep breath; she was never going to accomplish anything like this. I will tell him when the time is right, she thought inwardly.

Make him stay.

Leilani glanced back over her shoulder at Remus. Well it doesn't look like he's going anywhere at the moment, so don't worry about it.

It will work this time. It must.

Well, not if we rush things, so do us both a favor and cultivate a little patience.

Patience is weakness.

Leilani pretended she hadn't heard this comment and went back to her research. If only she could create just the right potion, it would make things so much easier.

Just as Remus was beginning to feel the first pangs of hunger, Nottie and Lucky appeared in front of him with a sandwich and tea.

"Would you like some lunch, Mr. Randy? " Nottie asked him.

"That sounds wonderful." Remus set his book down and accepted the plate that Nottie eagerly handed him. Lucky, just as eagerly, stepped forward and somehow managed to dump the entire cup of tea in Remus' lap.

The burning liquid almost audibly scalded Remus' thigh and began dripping little lines of fire down his leg. He bit the inside of his cheek against the pain, then was distracted by the self-punishment ritual that Lucky had begun. The little elf was beating himself with anything he could lift. His brother kept prying objects out of his hands only to turn around and see that they had been replaced with some new instrument of torture.

Winston and Leilani appeared in moments. As Leilani assisted Nottie in trying to calm Lucky, Winston quickly took stock of the situation. A wave of the hand and the cup and saucer had repaired themselves. Another flourish and Remus' trousers were dry. Remus looked up again to find that Leilani had given up talking sense into Lucky and had just levitated the entire room about a half-inch above the elf's reach.

There was a single second of pure silence. Remus tried not to grit his teeth at the blisters he felt raising on his thigh. Winston's magic was wonderful for cleaning the mess, but had done nothing for the injury it caused.

Lucky turned to look at Remus and it was obvious he had been crying. "Mr. Randy…….Lucky is very very sorry." That said, he turned and fled the room.

"Oh for Magic's Sake," Leilani spat out in exasperation, "You'd think he just murdered my firstborn." The levitated objects fell to the ground with a thud and she turned to address Winston and Nottie. "Would you two go make sure Lucky doesn't do any permanent damage to himself?" They left the room silently.

Leilani turned back to look at Remus with concern. "Are you okay? How hot was that tea?"

"I'm fine. Perhaps you should go check on the little one."

"You know something, Remus," Leilani started conversationally sat in the chair next to his. "It is true that you learn something new everyday. Take today, for instance. I have just learned that you are a terrible liar. Now where did it get you?"

"I'm quite serious. I'm fine. I've explained to you several times that my kind heals quickly."

Leilani shook her head and clucked her tongue. " Pathetic. Truly awful deception skills. No one in their right mind would believe a statement that started with the phrase 'I'm quite serious'." Her hand floated a moment above his lap before coming to rest on his right knee. She closed her eyes and a cooling sensation washed over him. Remus sighed in relief as he felt the heat blisters recede.

"Thank you." he said.

Leilani got up and returned a moment later with her sandwich and tea, half of which she poured into Remus repaired cup. They ate silently for a while.

"I have to ask - " Remus started.

"I knew you would," Leilani smiled, "Though you've held out longer than I expected."

Remus turned to look at her.

"You want to know how Lucky came to have that name."

"Well, yes," he admitted, "It seems so . . . inappropriate."

"I imagine it would to you," she slowly took a sip of tea, enjoying what little suspense she could build, "But it's very appropriate. By all rights, Lucky shouldn't even be here."

"What do you mean?"

"Nottie and Lucky are the only twin house elves recorded in history. Or in what little bit of history we keep of them. House elves miscarry all the time. They spend so much energy and power serving their respective Masters that they have very little strength left to nurture a child. If there is a case of twins, one always dies in utero, most of time both of them do."

"When I found out that Dainty was pregnant, I had Mother cut her duties in half. When I found out she was pregnant with twins, I made her my special project. There were many difficulties, but I managed to bring them both into this world, although Lucky nearly didn't make it. He was lucky he survived; hence, the name."

"Yes, well, then, I suppose it would have seemed appropriate at the time," Remus agreed.

"Mother calls them runts. She said if I hadn't wasted all my talents on them she might have turned out with at least one good house elf, but I know she has a soft spot for them anyway. Otherwise she would never have kept her promise to me not to sell them."

"Ah. So contrary to all you've tried to convince me, your Mother does actually have a heart."

"Possibly, hidden somewhere in that deep dark soul, but it's very small and only beats intermittently."

"Oh that is certainly implied."

A wide smile spread across Leilani's face. "If I didn't know better, I'd think you were teasing me."

Remus suddenly found himself too busy dusting crumbs off his trousers to look Leilani in the eye – time for a change of subject. "That Winston is quite a character as well."

Leilani folded her arms, she wasn't letting him off that easy. "You do like the word 'quite', don't you?"

"Indeed. I do"

"Oh, 'indeed'? You're pulling that out of the archives too? So tell me, Professor, are the halls of Hogwarts swarming with school children saying things like 'quite' and 'indeed'?"

Remus felt his cheeks redden, but found he was much more comfortable on this end of a joke than the other. "About Winston," he reminded her.

Fortunately, Leilani also understood when to drop a joke. "He is a piece of work, isn't he? I was very young when Mother purchased him, but my father always complains that he cost a fortune. From what I gather there was slick saleswizard who sold her on his breeding and education. Convinced her that a family like the Kontos couldn't settle for an ordinary house elf, we needed one to compliment our snobbery. I mean, who has a house elf named Winston? The name itself is dripping with snobbishness. He cares as much about his appearance as his work, and his speech is amazing. Mother thinks he was well worth the money. Trust me, he is a source of constant bickering between my parents, we've all grown rather fond of him."

As Remus was finishing his last bite of lunch, he noticed that Winston had reappeared in front of them.

"How's Lucky?" Leilani asked him.

"He will live," the elf reported dryly. "He does, however, refuse to leave Master Randy's bathroom."

"Okay. Perhaps I can talk him down." She paused a moment, then fixed a stern gaze on Winston, "Did you really tell him he was hopeless?"

Winston looked down at his feet and said nothing. Leilani just shook her head. "I expected more from you. Especially coming from the elf that once broke my entire antique porcelain tea set." She looked over at Remus, "I was 6 at the time," she explained, "And I had spent ages planning my little tea party. I made up invitations for all my dolls. I planned the menu and decorations. And I was meticulous about the seating arrangements, as many of my 'guests' weren't all that friendly with each other." She shook her head dramatically. "And then . . . The Accident. I was just devastated. Several of my dolls refused to speak to me for weeks afterwards."

Remus thought he might have seen Winston roll his eyes again. Much to his credit, the elf said nothing to defend himself.

Leilani jumped to her feet. "Of course, I think that's just the story to cheer Lucky up. Even the great Winston is not infallible."

She left the room chuckling to herself. Winston just sighed and followed her.


	5. Chapter 5

Friday morning Remus woke before daybreak. His stomach was strangely uneasy as he dressed and headed down the stairs. Why was he so nervous, he wondered to himself. There was no reason to be so nervous about leaving.

It might be Leilani. He hadn't told her that he planned to leave today. He hadn't given much thought about it really and now, faced with the moment, he had no idea how he was going to thank her for all she had done for him.

He turned into the kitchen to find it dark and empty. Through the eastern window he could see the sun was just starting it's daily ascent. Leilani must not be awake yet. Perhaps he should leave her a letter. Yes, he thought as he chose a teacup from the cupboard, a well-written thank you note would be much less messy than a face-to-face goodbye; a good way to avoid the uncomfortable moment when so many people become suddenly and inexplicably sentimental.

He began a mental composition of the letter, but by the time his tea was ready, he'd abandoned the idea completely. Leilani deserved better than that. He would wait for her to wake up and thank her properly. He would not disappear into the darkness.

"Good morning! You're up early today." Leilani's breathless but sunny voice startled him. He turned to face her and was surprised to see her in formless Muggle clothes and looking almost wet.

"Good morning," he replied, "I didn't think you were up yet."

"Oh yes, I'm a little bit of a morning bird," she paused to down a glass of water in one gulp, "Plus it's the best time of the day to go jogging."

"Jogging?" Remus asked incredulously. He realized how that must have sounded and, not wanting to appear rude, added, "How interesting." He watched in fascination as she re-filled the glass and, again, downed it in one long gulp.

"Don't you mean 'how Muggle' of me?"

Leilani had an infuriating way of reading between the lines, and Remus had learned it was best not to deny the truth. "The thought had crossed my mind," he admitted.

Leilani had moved to the coffeepot and started measuring water into it. "Well, just because we choose to explore our magical selves, it doesn't mean we should forget our responsibilities towards our physical selves. Some of the wizards and witches I've met in my travels were in such poor physical condition, that I wonder if it's only magic that keeps them functioning," she pressed the Brew button purposely and turned to face him. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm just going to run up and take a shower. After that, I'll start breakfast."

By the time Leilani had returned, Remus was just putting breakfast on the table. He gestured for her to sit down and handed her a cup of coffee.

"This is a nice surprise." She smiled as she took a sip.

Remus chuckled. "If that's your way of saying that it's about time I did something around here, you'd be right." His joke sounded hollow in his own ears. Leilani took a bite of her toast but said nothing. She watched him intently and Remus figured it was now or never.

"Leilani. I'd like to offer my gratitude for your generosity. Over the past week and a half you have provided me with food, clothing, healing and even friendship. All of which I truly appreciate." He paused and glanced up from his plate. Leilani was still staring at him curiously.

"Why are you talking to me like that?" she asked.

"Like what?"

"I don't know. Like you're writing a letter. Or reminiscing about a long lost acquaintance or something," her eyes widened as realization dawned upon her, "You're planning on leaving today, aren't you?"

"Yes and I just want to – "

"And you're not good with good-byes, are you?"

"No, not particularly, so I –"

"Oh, how sweet."

"I try to ease the tension in this type of situation by planning –"

"But completely unnecessary."

Remus gave up trying to address the previous thought and focused on the present. "Well I hardly think it would be appropriate to just take off after all you've done for me."

"No, no," Leilani said as she waved his statement aside. "Not that. I mean the goodbye isn't necessary since you're not leaving."

Remus blinked. She had made that statement so matter-of-factly, so simply but surely, that for a split second he had almost accepted it as fact.

"Listen, Leilani. I really can't impose on you any further. I've been well enough to travel for a few days now, and it's time I should be leaving."

"'Well enough to travel' does not mean well," Leilani told him, "What kind of Healer would I be if I let you leave here any less than one hundred percent?"

Remus sighed inwardly. He wasn't sure he could remember a time when he was ever one hundred percent. He had long ago stopped considering that an attainable goal.

"You are a talented and devoted Healer," he assured her, "But I can't ask you to do any thing more for me. It will take me years to repay you for all you've done already."

Leilani slammed her fork down on the table. "This is not about money, Remus. I would think you would have realized that by now."

Her sudden flared temper made Remus glad he was the one who had cooked their breakfast. "I didn't mean to insinuate that it was," he said softly, "I'm not sure what all this is about, but I know that I feel indebted to you. I'm sure can find that understandable. And this debt is only going to grow larger the longer I stay here."

"It's about helping you, Remus," Leilani explained almost desperately, "This is who I am; this is what I do. I fix people. I fix the world one person at a time, and you, my friend, are still broken. I can't let you leave like that."

Remus saw that there was something more to what she was saying. He could see a struggle inside her as she tried to decide how much to say to him. And he saw that there was something she was hiding. Something that she decided to keep hiding.

He reached across the table and touched her hand. "I know you mean well, Leilani, but you just can't fix what is wrong with me. No one can."

Leilani looked up and into his eyes. "Remus Lupin," she said firmly, "This is my house and I insist that you stay until you are completely healed."

Remus felt something dissolve in him. It disappeared completely and left him slightly confused in the void. Was there something he was saying? Or thinking maybe? Something he wanted to do? He shrugged as nothing came to him. It must not have been that important. He gazed around at the kitchen. The warm, comfortable, restful kitchen. Yes, he thought, this is a good place to heal.

He went back to eating his breakfast, until he noticed Leilani looking at him. "Everything okay?" he asked her.

"Fine," she replied, "I was just wondering . . . since you're feeling better today, would you mind helping me out in the greenhouse?"

Remus thought about this for a moment. It wasn't like he had any other plans. "I'd be happy to help," he told her, "Might do me good to get out of the library a while."

"Good," she smiled cautiously, "Very good. Just dress in layers, okay?"


	6. Chapter 6

When Remus followed Leilani into the greenhouse, he was surprised to see a long hallway with several doors. The entrance door closed behind them with an echoing thud and Leilani turned to look and him questioningly.

"What are you wearing?"

"Excuse me?"

"What's under that?" she asked again as she gestured at his clothes.

"What?" Remus was at a loss as how he should answer.

"Layers, Remus. How many layers are you wearing?"

"Oh. I have a short sleeved shirt on under this," her told her, wondering why she was suddenly so interested in his clothes. They were, after all, her clothes. Come to think of it, why did she have so many men's clothes? He looked down at his jumper and wondered vaguely who had worn it before him.

His musing was interrupted by the appearance of a jacket floating in the air in front of him. He looked up to see Leilani tuck her wand in the waistband of her skirt and reach for the jacket that hovered before her.

Something about the scene struck Remus as odd. It took a minute for him to realize it was the wand. He didn't recall ever seeing Leilani use a wand before. But she must have; she was a witch. An eccentric, Muggle-loving witch, but a witch nonetheless; and a wand was part of the essence of their kind. Remus' palm tingled slightly as he thought of his own wand. He missed it. The comforting weight in his hand, the secure feeling of knowing one can draw on magic and strength in a moments notice; this is what all his kind felt when they grasped the slender stick.

The feeling was one that he knew dark beast inside him would never understand. It was the reason why the morning after a full moon, his wand was the first thing for which Remus reached. It made him feel so very far from home now to know that it had been left behind.

"Don't just stare at it," Leilani admonished him impatiently, "Put it on."

Remus held up the jacket and decided the word "Parka" would better describe it. Complete with a fur-lined hood and sewn in gloves, it looked as though it would keep him warm if he were tramping through Antarctica. She had to be kidding. It wasn't nearly this cold out, and they were going into a greenhouse. He looked up to see Leilani in similar clothing and looking as he might imagine an impatient Eskimo.

"Thank you," he said politely, "But I really think I'll be okay. I'm quite comfortable."

Leilani opened her mouth as if to argue with him, but seemed to think better of it.

"Suit yourself," she shrugged, and opened the door.

A blast of frigid air hit him in the face, knocking the breath right out of him. He quckly slipped the coat on and buttoned it as fast as his gloved hands would allow. When he looked up, Leilani was doubled over in laughter. He cleared his throat.

"I'm sorry, " she said as she wiped tears of mirth from her eyes, "That was priceless. You should have seen the look on your face."

"You could have warned me, " he told her accusingly.

"Now what would have been the fun in that?"

Remus ignored the comment and checked to see everything was buttoned up properly. "I'm ready," he told her.

Leilani reopened the door and they walked into what was possibly the coldest environment Remus had ever felt. When the door closed behind them, the wind subsided, making the cold still and at least a little more bearable.

"Don't worry," Leilani assured him, "We won't be here long. I just need to check on the little guys to make sure it's not too warm for them."

Remus tried not to shiver visibly. It was difficult to imagine it to be too warm for anything. Everywhere he looked he saw snowdrifts. He was surrounded by them. Big snowdrifts, little snowdrifts, medium-sized snowdrifts. The blinding whiteness dazzled his eyes.

Leilani headed towards a smallish drift in the far corner and began pawing through the snow. Remus peered over her shoulder to see what she was uncovering.

Ice. Big surprise.

Wait.

Ice in the shape of leaves? He leaned over to take a closer look and was able to make out a ground covering of leaves

"Is this Azure Crystirum?" he asked, awed.

"Yes it is." Leilani nodded, "I'm impressed, Professor. Have you ever seen Azure Crystirium before?"

"No. But I read up on it after it was mentioned in Herbology and Advanced Potions. The plants are illegal on this continent, aren't they?"

"Ten points for Gryffindor," Leilani told him approvingly, " And ten more if you can tell me why."

Remus couldn't resist the automatic answer that years of study had ingrained in him, "If not kept at the correct temperature, the leaves start to melt and let off a poisonous gas for which there is no known cure. In addition, although the fruit of the plant is used in many powerful healing potions, they are also widely used in the Dark Arts. The Ministry watches the distribution of all Azure Crystirium derivatives very closely."

"No wonder they made you a Professor." Leilani commented, "Now, we just came to make sure everything is as it should be here. Look over the leaves and see if there are any sections that look a little cloudy; that's the first sign that it's getting too warm in here."

Remus bent down and brushed more snow away. The plant was beautiful, its leaves as delicate and intricately detailed as the pattern of frost that spread across the windows of Remus' flat on the coldest of winter months. He lifted a leaf to study it more closely.

"Be careful not to touch any one spot for longer than 5 seconds," Leilani warned him, "Your body heat might affect them." Remus nodded and went back to work.

When he and Leilani had finished, Remus stepped back as a spray of fine snow issued from the tip of Leilani's wand and began to cover the plants.

"How did you get them?" he asked her.

"I have my ways, " she answered slyly, for the woman savored every bit of mystery or suspense she could build, "Don't you worry about it." She lowered her wand and looked around her, "These second years are the most delicate. If they were fine, I'm sure all the rest will be too."

Remus again gazed at the various sized drifts surrounding him. "Is all this Azure Crystirium?"

"Yes. The plant has a seven year life cycle, but only produces fruit the third and seventh year. I have them here in every stage of growth."

When they left the room, Remus was grateful for the sudden warmth of the long hallway. Leilani allowed them a few minutes to stomp their feet and rub their hands together before moving down towards the next door.

Each room mimicked a different geographical region and was filled with flowers and plants, some exotic and beautiful, some rare and powerful. Remus couldn't recall ever seeing a larger collection of flora in one place. It required a lot of upkeep, and Leilani kept him working through the entire day.

At last they came to the final door and Leilani turned to him, "Well, we're done for today. This is the herb room. I just need to grab some cilantro and green onion for our fajitas tonight. Why don't you head inside and start getting cleaned up for dinner."

Remus smiled blissfully at the thought of a hot shower and headed for the house.

By the time Leilani had finished her shower and entered the kitchen, he was feeling much refreshed and was enjoying a cup of tea. Leilani smiled a thank you, grabbed the cup Remus had made for her, and started their dinner.

"You have a very extensive collection," Remus told her, "I've never seen so many species in one place.

"It keeps me busy," Leilani admitted, "But I enjoy the work. Besides, many of those plants are vital for my healing potions, and it's not easy to get a steady supply with the Ministry casting doubts on my practice."

Remus nodded. It did make sense, but what didn't make sense to him was why someone so passionate about their calling would put themselves in a position to be unable to practice it.

"Have you always been interested in Muggle medicine?" he asked her.

"Well, I've known I wanted to be a Healer for as long as I can remember. When I started Hogwarts I already knew what path I would pursue. I was sorted into Ravenclaw and spent my first four years studying incessantly. It was that summer before my fifth year that everything changed."

"What do you mean?"

"My Great Aunt Constance. She had long been my favorite Aunt and she had taken ill, so I spent most of that summer holiday helping to care for her. She was a muggle-born witch, and I hear it was quite the family scandal with my Great Uncle married her. Anyway, we spent a lot of time talking, and one day she told me about an illness she had as a very young child. She had a raging fever that would not break, so her parents had tied sliced potatoes to her hands and feet to draw the heat out."

"Potatoes?"

"Yeah, that was my reaction too. I thought it was the most ridiculous thing I had ever heard. I made some joking comment to her about Muggle medicine, but she told me not to be so quick to judge. She told me it worked."

"But potatoes? For a fever?" Remus had to be sure he had heard her right.

Leilani paused in her chopping, "Yes, dear Professor, I believed we've covered that already and the story is moving on now."

"Please go on," Remus tried to look properly chastised. The fajitas were smelling wonderful and it wouldn't do to get her irritated while she was cooking.

"Well, I just couldn't bring myself to believe it and she wouldn't let the issue go. She told me that open-mindedness and the ability to "look outside the box" were going to be important in my chosen profession. That was one of her favorite expressions; she thought creative thinking could solve any problem. So she challenged me to an experiment. She would lay a minor course upon me, give me a short-lived fever, and I would try her Muggle remedy. I agreed."

"And I guess you're going to tell me it worked."

"Yes. Granted, we have much better ways of curing a fever, but it just fascinated me that it had actually worked. It made me wonder what other secret cures they have. Aunt Constance filled me with all kinds of stories from her Muggle upbringing, and I decided the subject was worth researching. I was sure that I wouldn't find anything more advanced or better than our Healing, but perhaps something to compliment it, to fill in some of the spaces we have, you know?"

"Yes, in your articles, I do think some of your theories had real merit," Remus admitted.

Leilani blushed happily as she served him a plate. "Thank you, but I thought you really didn't have an opinion on them."

"I re-read them the other day. "

"I see."

They ate for a while in silence and Remus thought back his year teaching in Hogwarts. It was the most fulfilling job he had ever had and the only other place in the world that he considered home. He would have given anything to continue there, to stop being what he was and to just be Professor Lupin. He had been forced out by a reality that he could not fight, a part of himself that it was impossible to disown.

This was the difference between them. Leilani was barred from her calling by a belief she would not disown. He wondered if she too would go weary of being who she was. He wondered if she would ever take the opportunity that he longed for, the chance to let go of a part of herself to become accepted.

He doubted it. Unlike him she had chosen this path, and he could not see her willfully abandoning it. She was determined to stand bravely until the world either brought her to her knees or appreciated what she had to say. He watched her take a sip of her tea, so calm and composed now, but liable to be fiery and inspired 5 minutes from now and wondered how it was that Gryffindor had not chosen her.

Author's Note: Hi guys. Since I have your attention, well hopefully I kept your attention anyway, I just wanted to thank everyone who's taken the time to read my story. Even bigger thanks for those of you who left me your wonderful reviews; they are inspiring and motivational. (As is my beta-reader and friend SiriusBlackfan5405 who convinced me to let her post the story.) Of course, I must also thank the magic-giving Goddess herself, J.K. Rowling, for introducing me to a world I just had to play in.

Anyway, I just want to let you know that I don't intend to drag this out forever. Leilani's secret will be coming out in the next few chapters – BUT – that won't be the end of the story. I hope it will be interesting enough to keep you reading. - Taleel


	7. Chapter 7

Remus didn't bother looking for Leilani as he headed down the stairs. It was Monday, which meant Leilani would have been up early to go her "house calls" and Remus would be on his own for breakfast.

House calls. Where Leilani came up with these archaic muggle terms he would never know. And now he was finding his own vocabulary peppered with them. Not that he minded, really, but it was a one of quite a few signs that he'd been here too long. He couldn't help but to notice that he had just fixed himself a cup of tea on complete autopilot - no need to think about where the cups or the teabags were - no need to keep an eye out so as not to trip over a chair leg or bang his hipbone against the countertop. Almost as if he lived here.

Not that he hadn't tried to leave. Always wary of overstaying his welcome, Remus had mentioned leaving several times, but Leilani just had this amazing ablility to talk him out of it. She seemed to actually enjoy his company, crazy as that sounds. Of course, she was an exiled witch; she was probably happy to have any company at all - even a stuffy, intellectual, ex-professor, werewolf like him. And, of course, he was her patient, and she was a dedicated healer with a long-term view on health. So no doubt much of her interest was professional. Yes, that made sense; and it explained all her questions about werewolves. She probably imagined she could heal the werewolf right out him. Remus found himself chuckling darkly. If only it were that easy.

Still it was odd. It was almost as if Leilani wouldn't let him leave. And as time had gone on, her barrage of questions had only increased, he couldn't remember the last time he'd been examined so closely. Remus tried to ignore the tiny spark of hope that flashed inside him. Leilani . . . she was so talented, so dedicated, so unconventional and inspired. Surely if anyone could heal the dark ailment, it was her. The spark kindled into a tiny flame. Maybe he should see just how much Leilani knew about his affliction, whether she had any real interest in it. Before he even realized it, Remus was on his feet and headed towards the library. He didn't stop until he was in the middle of the room.

"Lycanthropy." He said aloud as he raised his eyes to search for the tell-tale glow of Leilani's organizational spell. He spun slowly in a circle, casting his gaze into every corner of the room.

Nothing.

It must not be a very large section if he couldn't see it from here. Remus felt his tiny flame of hope falter, no wonder Leilani had so many questions on the subject. He carefully walked up and down each aisle, repeating the word from time to time, searching for the tiniest glow or shimmer to let him know this book was about werewolves.

Still nothing.

Confused, he sat down in the nearest chair. He'd never heard of a healer who hadn't studied Lycanthropy – knowledge of the subject was a necessity for the vocation. Yet, he could not find a single book or even a study scroll. He must have missed it somehow.

His musing was interrupted by a low growl in his stomach. Yes that was it. He was so hungry that he must have skipped an area or aisle in his eagerness to get to breakfast. He decided to come back and try again after he had eaten.

* * * * *

A full stomach did not yield Remus any better results. After breakfast he repeated his meticulous search and, once again, found himself sitting in his favorite chair feeling confused and downhearted.

That was when the fabric walked in. Remus stared a moment before he realized the pile of fabric was being carried by a tiny house elf.

"Nottie?" he asked hopefully.

There was a small sharp sound, not unlike the bark of a small dog, and fabric flew in every direction. So, this was Lucky then.

"M-Mister Randy. Lucky did not see you." Lucky ran around the room collecting the hideously pretentious fabric and, well, to Remus it looked more like he was rolling it into balls then folding it.

"I'm sorry, Lucky. I didn't mean to scare you."

"Lucky is bringing these drapes to the Young Mistress. My Lady does not need them."

Almost against his will, Remus' eyes were drawn back to the grandiose fabric. He couldn't imagine them on any of Leilani's windows. His brain seemed to have trouble even processing the fact they were in her house. "Leilani's not in, but if you leave them on the kitchen table, I'll let her know where they came from." He rose and circled the room thoughtfully

"Mister Randy, you look like you need help. Can Lucky help you?"

Remus sighed audibly and rubbed his neck. "Thank you, Lucky, but I don't think so. I'm just completely baffled by the lack of any Lycanthropy books in this library."

"L-Li – Ly," Lucky struggled to get the word out.

"Lycanthropy," Remus helped him, "Werewolves."

"Oh, oh Lucky **can** help!" the house elf was jumping up and down in his excitement, "Lucky knows the reason. The Young Mistress studies about the werewolves all the time, so she keeps the books in her office. Mister Randy can find them in the office."

Office? "Lucky? Where is the office?"

The tiny elf looked around, then scampered to the far wall of the library.

"_Occultus asseus, mea paenitenta_," he intoned.

A large section the shelves swung open to reveal the entrance to Leilani's office. Remus rushed forward eagerly, but stopped at the threshold, suddenly hesitant about entering the healer's private workspace. He glanced back at Lucky, as if looking for permission to enter the room. "Thank you, Lucky. For your help."

"Mister Randy is welcome." Lucky smiled brilliantly and Remus got the feeling this was the first task he had completed all day without some sort of mishap. "Lucky will be putting the drapes in the kitchen now." He turned and was gone, leaving Remus to face the great question alone.

To enter or not to enter?

It's not like he wanted to pry or anything, He just wanted a book to read, and it happened to be that he wanted to read about werewolves and Lucky said he could find those in the office. For Magic's Sake, even his thoughts were rambling. He would be a polite guest. He would quickly choose a book and leave. Nothing wrong with that. He took a deep breath and stepped into the office. The first thing that surprised Remus about the room was its size. It was nearly half the size of the Library and a good portion of the room was filled with bookshelves.

"Lycanthropy."

The bookshelves lit up so brightly that Remus nearly had to shield his eyes. It took a moment for his vision to adjust, but he quickly realized that every book in the room dealt with the subject. There were hundreds of them. Remus stepped closer and began to investigate the titles. Every book he had ever read on the subject, some that he'd only heard of, a few that were completely unfamiliar and . . was that fiction? Yes! There were even muggle novels about werewolves. He turned around to take in the rest of the room and saw charts and diagrams of canine anatomy and physiology with arrows and notations in tiny cramped handwriting. On the far wall was another shelving system with many, many scrolls filled with the same handwriting, Some of them looked recent and others so old, only magic could be keeping them in one piece. His eyes couldn't help scanning the contents of the paperwork on the desk.

**The subject has healed as quickly as I expected, but he wants to leave and I'm not sure how much longer my spells can keep him here.**

Subject? Remus felt a small, cold ball of anger form in the pit of his stomach. As in the subject of a study or experiment ? And spells? Leilani was not just persuasive; she was using magic to keep him here. How could he have missed it? Suddenly Remus knew he had to be gone before Leilani got back.

Then he heard a voice drawing nearer to him.

"-can't believe my mother thinks I would even consider hanging these hideous things."

Remus was leaving the office just in time to see Leilani entering the library from the other side of the room. She looked at the open door behind him, the angry look on his face, and, finally, down at the messy balls of fabric in her arms. She cleared her throat uncomfortably.

"Well . . . I see that Lucky must have stopped by."


End file.
